First Week at Kubang Kerian.

First Week at Kubang Kerian.

Hi and Assalammualaikum dearest. How are you feeling today? Hope you able to find ease while reading another chronicle of my life. It’s nothing much but an experience of staying in Kelantan for about one week? More or less. And what am I doing here…. is actually because of the campus-calling, lol. It’s been like one plus year I started my degree, and not to mention, as online student at home. But the time has come now. Being at campus taught me two three things and I realize how important it is to appreciate each of the lessons here.

But first of all, I never knew the journey to Perak-Kelantan was that exhausted. East-west highway that provided is not highway that I’ve imagined. It’s so dizzy, tiring and exciting (over the fact that it was my first time, lol!) and honestly, it reminded me over the journey to Cameron Highland, which I hate but alhamdulillah, we safely arrived after 6 hours. Prior ahead the registration date, we were staying at Sarah’s house for few days. Sarah was my childhood friend, back then at Melaka. We grew up together, trying stupid things that you can think of for girls till she had to move to Kelantan. It’s fascinating how we were able to meet again after 7 years. Shameless plug but I cherish her with all my heart. If there’s one thing I can describe her, it is.. strong. And her mum’s cooking..? Chef kiss. That flashback when her mum always sent food to our home… I miss that. Bless.

Back to campus life, Alhamdulillah, I think it’s all good? No drama to be concerned at yet since it just first week except on how I deal with my own behavior and actions here ahaha. My roommates are good people. My PBL mates are too. I also did interact with my batchmates as well during practical session and basically, new faces that entering my life is added continuously here. Being a shy person, it’s quite hard honestly. Two of the girls in my PBL are people that are very friendly with everyone. Every time I am with them, people would recognize them and I feel so small in term of that ahahah. There is nothing wrong with them. In fact, I write this blog post in order to ensure myself that there is nothing wrong with me too. So Ariena, listen.

It’s okay to feel shy. You are at new place, you are with new people. It’s okay to feel like that.

I know it takes time for me to break the wall and openly express my feelings but over all things, the most important thing is to be true at least toward myself. I completely aware that I would like to get out from my own comfort zone in term of social life. However, it cannot be done in a day. So ariena, calm down. I want to avoid the insecure term because it seems negative to say to my own self, and I think I am not insecure, lol. I just feel shy, that’s it. I know my own strength. I am doing great and it is okay if it takes time. People are not mean, and the time will come, for me to find my circle I guess. In Shaa Allah.

That’s it for now. The purpose to write the post is achieved. I think validating my feelings through writing bring so much compassion to myself. Good, good. Hehe. Bye!

Books no longer bring joy.

Books no longer bring joy.  

Assalammualaikum everyone. Hope this post finds you, healthy physically and mentally. Ameen. 

Coming here again after a while because I'm having holiday break currently. I've been planning to update since day one of the holiday but, this girl just do not know when to begin, specifically. Now that I feel like my days seem colorless, I decided to read other people blog and get inspired to write one ahaha. Just a quick and short life update, I guess?

I think I have contact some of my friends during this break and repeated the same thing over and over again regards my life update so I want to skip the formality and tell you the other pieces of my life story. Perhaps, the thing that I do not like people around me get to know about this but this open public post do not mind me? Lol. Yes, you read the title of this post right.

I find it's hard for me to read these days. All the books seems dull and I always sleep at the end of second flip page or I just do not understand what the author's idea.  It frustrating how I always say " Oh, things that keep me happy is reading book. " back then, but now I can no longer feel the same thing anymore. Despite having second thought of buying new books, (realizing the books at home not able to bring joy anymore), I wonder how far the truth is. 

The only thing that make me happy these days are listening to other people story and how they've been at lately. Especially my close friends. T just texted me yesterday. S also sent me mails last week. I'm happy to see my friends happy. Or at least the fact that we are still caring for each other. I wish I can see them whenever I want but Malaysia is too big to go here and there freely I guess. I have no friends at my place right now since I moved away from Melaka so it's quite lonely at some points. Especially during holidays now, more free time is available but the girl does not know how to do self-healing properly. It's time to pick up new hobbies while trying to make amends with my books relationship in between. What would that be..?

ps: i am also happy reading blog entries. i guess i am very interested in knowing people stories ahaha. what is your favourite blogger so perhaps i could read too? 

Words of the year 2022.

Words of the year 2022.

Hi and assalammualaikum dear self. It's been a long time you wrote.. Do you neglect your wild thoughts by intent and choose to ignore? Oh, I wish you have make your time to write. I know that everyday is constants play button instead of the option for pause button... but trust me, you (in the future) will definitely appreciate if you (today) write more. But.. That's okay.

 

If 'purpose' was word of the year that you (in the past) have personally chose for 2021, I would advise you to choose two words for this year, which are ketenangan dan kesederhanaan. I can't help but to choose two and they are in bahasa since it sounds more classic. Lately, I've been obsessed with subscription mail by JIWA. It calls, Surat Jiwa, buat Kamu. I fall in love everytime I read the letter that come to light my day. I wish it would be a trend again to send surat and all that.

 

Ketenangan. Yes, I hope by the end of 2022, you could appreciate ketenangan more. You've been too anxious these days, silly. You've been concerned too much. You've been worried too much. Being such doesn't really help you to progress.. Instead, you are being trapped, with your own world. Yes, I did not invalidate your feelings, like at all, but that is unhealthy feeling if it is constant one go feeling without break. What are you worry for? What are you anxious for?

 

Tenang. Semuanya, akan berlalu. Semuanya akan baik-baik sahaja. Semua ini akan berakhir. Dan kau akan berjumpa penghujung dan akhirnya kembali dengan dunia yang lebih indah, yang tiada penghujung. Aku tidak menyalahi diri engkau untuk merasakan semua itu. Jadi, hiduplah secara besederhana. Jangan lelah. Jangan gentar. Kehidupan, beginilah. Walau acap kali kau merasakan, engkau tidak mampu menanggung perasaan ini seorang diri, ingatlah bahwa kau memiliki tuhan yang sentiasa berada di sisi engkau. Jangan bersedih selalu, senyum dan teruskan perjuanganmu, kerna aku sentiasa bangga padamu. Terima kasih untuk segalanya, wahai diriku.

 

Selamat ulang tahun, salam dua dekad.